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I have a question for you…

Do you know what your kryptonite is? That emotion or state of being you find yourself defaulting to when you encounter discomfort or edgy?

My kryptonite is overwhelm.

As I approach one year of being out out of my corporate job and living life as an entrepreneur, I’ve been reflecting on how much un-learning I’ve had to do over the past 12 months. One of my biggest challenges has been realizing that I have an addiction to overwhelm. When tasks get a little challenging or my calendar feels a tad full, I notice how easily I can default into oh-my-god-there-is-so-much-to-do-and-I’m-freaking-out-about-it-all kind of feelings.

So I mentioned that I’m working to un-learn this default behavior, and I do that through creating a list of non-negotiables.

Non-negotiables are practices that I have committed to doing, knowing they help nourish me, ground me into my true self, and push me forward toward my vision for my life. When my email box fills up and life starts to feel a bit more than I can handle, I make sure I’m still practicing my non-negotiables (or my non-negosh, as I like to call them) to keep me on my path and drive me away from my old default habits of feeling overwhelm and freaking out.

My List of Non-Negotiables

- Getting at least 8 hours of sleep.

- Eating healthy food, incorporating greens and protein daily.

- Drinking water (I have a tendency to be dehydrated).

- Moving my body the way it wants – dance, yoga, pilates, walking, etc.

- Daily meditation – almost always in the morning.

- Daily connection with Tim – eating breakfast and dinner together, committing to date nights, and emphasizing physical touch.

- Dabbling and creative play, where there are no plans. I just create and enjoy the process.

- Connecting with people I love on a daily basis, whether by phone, email, or in person. I lean into my global sisterhood for support and encouragement, which always replenishes me to keep going.

What about you? Do you have a default state that you want to get past? Maybe it’s anger, sadness, confusion, or avoidance.

Try creating a list of your own non-negotiables (and share them in the comments!) to help you navigate through. I can tell you from experience, it really works.

Fennel Apple Strawberry Shrub

I featured this drink alongside some other lovely herbal mocktails at the creative day retreat I held at my house a few weeks ago, and it was a total hit.

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Homemade Chai Spice Candle

This fall is straight busy for me.

And not busy in the sense that I am unhappily overwhelmed with things I do not want to do. No, I am busy doing and being the things I couldn’t have imagined a year ago.  I am hosting events in my home and community that are helping women reconnect to their inner dabblist and find joy in working with their hands again. I am creating a holiday program filled with every fiber of my heart and soul. I am traveling to see friends and loved ones. I am coaching with incredible beings who are creating lives and businesses that nourish them inside and out. I am writing you from my couch with my sweet kitty snoring beside me. Life is pretty good.

But…I haven’t totally been practicing what I preach.

On Monday morning, after a full weekend of running a day retreat and filming for my holiday program, I woke up with intense pain running up and down my back and neck. I couldn’t walk without looking like a robot and winced whenever I had to turn my head.

My body was saying “Stop! Pay attention to me!”

And I had no choice but to do that. I had to clear my calendar – rescheduling clients, canceling calls, and focusing 100% on what I needed to feel better. That meant getting bodywork,  a lot of sleep, drinking water and healing bone broth, seeing the chiropractor, and doing restorative yoga poses thanks to a friend who gives virtual yoga and pilates classes.

It took an intense amount of pain for me to wake up to the fact that my body needs (and deserves) care above anything else.

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Travel Tips
 

Whenever I sit with my journal and envision my ideal life, the word TRAVEL always comes up. I have a very deep, heart-aching desire to travel all over the world. And, as much as I like the feeling of being rooted in a home I love, I start to get a little twitchy after a month or so with no travel. This wanderlust has become a non-negotiable for me, so instead of resigning myself to wishing and hoping I could travel more, I’ve been making it happen this year by creating a business and life around my desire to travel more.

This fall is my busiest travel season yet and I thought it might be fun to share with you some of my tried and true travel tips.

Travel Tips from The Dabblist

  • Hydration is everything. I find that I need to drink double my normal amount of water when on the plane. To cut down on waste, I bring my bkr glass water bottle (so chic) and refill it at the airport water fountains. If I’m in a pinch, I’ll buy a large bottle at the bookstore but I like to avoid the plastic stuff as much as possible.
  • Aisle seat, hands down. I used to be a definite window gal, but with the amount of water I drink, being on the aisle is just a smarter move. I’ve had one too many awkward encounters with sleepy neighbors who’ve woken up with me straddling them trying to get to the lavatory.
  • Make or buy snacks ahead of time. Airplane food is no good and it’s hard to find healthy options in airport terminals (I usually go for a bag of almonds). I like to pre-make my energy balls and salads in a mason jar to carry on the plane with me.
  • To combat nasty plane air, I bring my Immune essential oil blend. I apply to my wrists 2-3 times throughout the flight and subtly breathe in the germ fighting oils.
  • Stretch and move on the plane. Those frequent trips to the bathroom really help with moving my body, but stretching feels amazing too. Here’s a great list of adapted yoga poses you can do on the plane. I find my hips really tighten up if I don’t do them at least once on the flight.
  • What to wear: comfy pants (never jeans), slip on shoes for security (I love Toms), a scarf – both to keep warm and look chic even in sweatpants, socks (which I bring in my bag) to keep my feet warm without having to wear my shoes on the plane, and I always put my hair in a top knot to prevent it from getting greasy and dirty.
  • Don’t travel with makeup on, it never ends well. (Though I am guilty of sometimes shading in my eyebrows.) Another note about skin! Plane air is usually really dry, so bring oils for your face. Trust me on this. Oils will regulate oil production. I used to get breakouts on flights because I either wore makeup or my face was freaked out by the dry air and started overproducing oil. I recommend jojoba or argan. (Here’s my face oil blend.)
  • Don’t drink alcohol on the plane, as tempting as it is. It will dry your skin, dehydrate you even more, and arriving hungover is the worst.
  • For jet lag and sleep, melatonin is your best friend. And if you are traveling far, my go-to trick is staying up as late as you can during the day to go to bed at normal bedtime hours in the timezone you are visiting.
  • Travel with manuka honey packets. I wash my face with it and add it to my tea for added antibacterial protection.
  • For packing, I discovered the Eagle Creek travel cubes for keeping similar clothing items together. I have one for underwear and socks, one for gym clothes, one for shirts, etc. So simple and yet so game changing.
  • When I arrive to my hotel, I immediately unpack my suitcase (putting everything away) to feel more settled. Then I usually create a little altar space in a corner of a room to clear the energy and feel grounded in the space.
  • When I arrive back home, I immediately unpack my suitcase and put it away, light some candles and take a bath to help me feel settled once again.

What about you jet setters out there? What are your best travel tips? Share in the comments!

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During my time on retreat last week, I had the realization that over the past year I’ve cultivated a deeper relationship with myself – particularly with my intuition. You know that part of you that has an inner knowing if what is real and true? You have heard it referred to as your gut or your oracle. It can live in your heart, your belly, or even your lady parts (<– mine lives there!).

Your intuition likely has a quiet voice .

A voice that can be drowned out with the stress of work, fear, or numbing agents like food, drugs, and alcohol. But the thing about your intuition is it never goes away. She’s always there, letting you know what your truth is.

For a long time, I thought I didn’t have intuition.

I was living a life full of anxiety, stress, hormonal silencing (more on this in a later post, it’s a doozie!) and forms of numbing. Because once you hear your intuition, it’s hard not to listen. Mine, of course, was telling me about this new life that awaited me – one full of joy and freedom and wonder. And, in order to get that life, I knew I would have to make some pretty big (and scary) decisions. So a little dose of fear with a pinch of numbing agents was my go-to until I finally decided to go for it and align my life with what my intuition had been telling me all along.

What happened next was pretty amazing. I’ve been able to build a business around doing what I love, help people re-align with their own intuitive knowing, and fall even more in love with my life (my body, my marriage, my community, and my business). And all it took was listening to my body and aligning with heart.

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Back when I was working my corporate job, I had this image on the desktop of my work computer. It was an Anthony Burrill print that said “Work Hard and Be Nice to People.”

I displayed it proudly, feeling like it made a statement about who I was (or wanted to be). Humble, driven, people-pleasing, kind, focused.  And while this phrase still very much resonates with and motivates me, it’s my definition of work that’s shifted from then to now.

Work Hard

What does the word “work” even mean?

I have found that the definition changes from person to person, making this is a favorite dinner party topic of mine.

I have found that the look of and feelings around “work” are programmed into our brains in our early years.

It’s how we saw our parents define in it. It’s how our teachers rewarded it. It’s how we saw the world and how it worked. Essentially, we all adapt to our definitions of work as a way to feel like we belong – in our tribe, in our family, in the world.

My work story is a complex one. I grew up in a household where both parents had graduate degrees and worked in high level government and corporate jobs. Belonging in my family meant excelling academically and working in a large organization. And there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s just how I was initially programmed to view “work” and “success”. So, when I got my high-level manager position at my corporate job, I felt a familiar sense of relief flood my body. I had made it. I belonged in my tribe. I had succeeded. But, if you know my story, you know that life was’t the right fit for me and I’ve been spending the last several years un-learning all of these mindsets and behaviors I took on to find my own sense of personal freedom and contentment in this world.

I was the girl who glorified the term busy. Busy meant important. Busy meant full. Busy meant belonging. But busy was hurting my body, my connection with my loved ones, and my access to my intuition.

Busy had to go.

And, even with all of my progress, I find this concept of hard work still comes up for me now and then. Now that I’m my own boss, I’ve found myself facing a new work story.  The work-so-hard-it-hurts entrepreneurial mentality I see permeating start-up culture doesn’t motivate me. It freaks me out and gives me the feeling that I’m at risk being kicked out of the pack if I don’t fall in line and do something that doesn’t come naturally to me.

So I don’t. I have been coming up with my own feminine prescription for hustle and flow.

How do we untangle from this concept of work being hard, a struggle, and exhausting? Here are some of my methods:

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